Give us this day, some shelf-stable bread,
and potable water enough to drink
and to activate the chemical heater.
And maybe a “rock or something” on which
to lean the steaming mess, entrée and all,
as depicted and described in this diagram.
Forgive us our trespasses,
for we have trespassed a lot today—
kinda goes with the territory, and the job.
And deliver us from evil,
particularly that which we have done
unto others. See also: “trespasses,” above.
For thine is the kingdom,
and the power,
and the glory.
And ours is 1,200 calories of brown-bag easy living.
“Every day is a holiday. Every day is a feast.”
Just go easy on the crackers. And don’t eat the Charms.
Because those are bad luck.
Note: A “Meal, Ready-to-Eat” (M.R.E.) is a high-calorie field ration developed and used by the U.S. military.
In 2010, Randy Brown prepared for deployment to Eastern Afghanistan as a member of the Iowa National Guard’s 2nd Brigade Combat Team, 34th Infantry ‘Red Bull’ Division. Instead, a paperwork snafu caused his retirement. He went to Afghanistan anyway, embedding with the unit as a civilian journalist in May-June 2011.